Garden of Knowledge.

I had this "garden"...if you will. A row of 11 pots, each with a different plant, that lined my outdoor patio area. I made sure all of them were full sunlight plants. My only responsibility was to water them...and water them I did. Unfortunately, my experience has been far less than Utopian. However, this experience has reinforced the fact that sometimes life doesn't give you exactly what you want, but some obscure metaphor for what you need.

The ridiculous Louisiana heat has been further complicated by the drought-like conditions. Some of my precious plants have just died all together, despite my extreme attempts to keep them hydrated. And even though I knew the others would probably be dead in a few days or so, I kept watering them...just hoping I could save them. But nothing was changing, other than the temperature...getting hotter, of course.

It took me a while, but I finally stopped watering the plants that were obviously dead. What good was it possibly going to do? I kept watering the ones who showed some sign of life, and hoped for the best.

Last night, I was ready to give up on almost all of the plants that had survived this far. However, I was distracted by a good friend and neighbor. It was a good thing that she distracted me with some words of wisdom and insight into my problems at work. As I raged on about how I'm just too giving and too kind to people who don't deserve it, I realized I was doing the same with my plants. I realized that I have to be more like myself as a gardener when I'm at work. I have to know that I have to give up on some of my cohorts and just keep doing what I'm doing to the best of my ability. Otherwise I'll sacrifice the ones who don't deserve it. And this, for me, is much easier said than done. But as I told my confidant, it is no longer a choice, it is necessary for me to do this in order to have a more harmonious workplace. Acting instead of reacting.

This morning I woke up and to my surprise, there were new buds in 3 of the pots.
So it made me question the topics of my conversation I had last night. Should I really give up on those people who seem to make my life a living hell? Or do I keep trying? And by trying I mean being respectful, going out of my way for, and helping at every opportunity. Am I sacrificing my own morals and judgment by ignoring intolerant aspects of my life?

The questions that filled my mind were complex and complicated, yet the answer came easily. I revisited my "garden" and the answer was clear and simple. And remembering a saying I often heard my mother say during my childhood, I decided to "cut my losses and move on".

-Gray